Its been a crazy year in terms of the health of my grandparents. One of my grandmother's, Baba, is dealing with dementia that is slowly taking away her mind. My grandfather, Dziadziu, is recovering from open heart surgery. And now the latest, my other grandmother, Babci, just suffered a mini-stroke last night. Babci, who has been trying to live without the aid of my grandfather, Dziadziu, has been having a very hard time. She is blind and is incapable of doing much on her own. Dziadziu essentially took care of everything for her before he suffered two very close incidents of congestive heart failure. While she is in an assisted living facility that does provide assistance to her, the assistance she receives does not come close to what Dziadziu used to do for her. She can barely feed herself without making a mess, she can't go to the bathroom on her own, and taking a shower is an ordeal and a half. Part of me wonders how Dziadziu, almost 90 years old, took care of so much for her. With Dziadziu not around, she has been breaking it off on my parents, mostly my dad, about everything. Then came the stroke last night. I don't have every single detail yet, but it all happened around 8:00 last night. I did get the update that it didn't appear to be a major incident, however she is remaining in the hospital overnight to ensure that it wasn't a precursor to a larger event. This was not exactly what she needed at this point in time. Unfortunately, this it what happens when you start closing in on the end of your life. Perhaps if she had taken better care of herself when she was younger, Babci wouldn't be as bad off as she is now. Yet, what's done is done. My only hope is that they don't tell Dziadziu till he is moved out of Yale New Haven Hospital and into a rehab facility. As of a few days ago, they were still keeping him at Yale due to a minor irregularity in his heart beat. And on that front, I hope that he recovers as quickly as possible so that he can spend more time with his wife. At this point, and at the age my grandparents are at, anything can happen at any time. Its almost as if its a waiting game to see what kind of ailment or incident will afflict them next.
Yesterday, before I heard the news about Babci, I went to see Baba down at her "home" in Westport. It was kind of sad to see her, a mere ghost of who she used to be. When I walked into her room, she was all set for bed at 5:45 and watching TV. I hadn't been down to see her in a while and didn't know what I would find. It seems with Baba that there are good days when she is talkative and upbeat, and days when she is in her own world, wherever that is. She hardly talked at all when I was there, perhaps because she was having trouble remembering certain words or just because she was very tired, I don't know. So I talked to her a little bit, and just sat with her the rest of the time. I told her about our son, showed her some pictures which she was excited to see, and then her attention went back to the TV and trying to read the words that popped up during commercials. She never quite finished all the words before the commercial ended and moved on to the next. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be at times to try and read the words on the screen and never have them be around long enough to make it through all of them. It made me realize yesterday just how quick commercials really are and the images that flash across the screen. I did notice that Baba had quite a bit of trouble with words and kept slipping between Russian, Spanish, and English. Despite the lack of conversation, I at least got to spend some time with her and she did thank me at the end for coming. It still amazes me that this time last year she was still a highly functioning woman. Yes, she was starting to show signs that something was amiss, but for the most part she was doing really well. This year, its completely different and unfortunately will never go back to the way it was. Memories will have to suffice at this point. In any case, its been a tough year so far and its not even over yet. Oh well, such is life. All of grandparent's just happen to be dealing with health issues at the same time. For now, and till they pass, I will be keeping every one of them in my prayers.
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