The last few days have been devoted to talking about my dogs. While I have many stories about them that could fill up page after page of blog posts, I figure I'll jump around like I always do and switch topics completely. Perspective. I doubt that dogs have or gain a sense of perspective in regards to time the way humans do. I have discovered that, at least for myself, that I have started looking at time and significance in a different way than I had in all my years leading up to now. For the record (and I know my blog details may be slightly off here) I am 32 years old and will be 33 in a few months. I was born in 1982 and for the longest time, it seemed like the 80's and early 90's happened just yesterday. It wasn't a big deal to look back and say, "that wasn't so long ago", because it was mostly true, at least for myself. Yet, a funny thing happens when you see news stories with a "retro report" and retro now means the 1980's. You start to realize that that decade was more than a quarter century in the past and that time has progressed quite a bit since then. It's not that its a sudden revelation that the 1980's were that far in the past, but more of a gradual understanding that overtakes you as you grow older and start to look at things differently. I guess for everyone, perspective on time will vary. Different people will realize different aspects of time at different points in their life. Its not even that its depressing to look back and realize that the period which I grew up in was thirty years ago, its more of an awareness moment. Its more about realizing the way in which events fit together in the overall scheme of things than anything else. Looking at this objectively, I can see where it can be construed as depressing by some. To look back and realize just how long ago one's childhood occurred can weigh on some people. I can see some people wondering how they missed the progression of time and where all those years went. For me, its just another day, just with a little different perspective on things. In a way, it makes me savor every day a little bit more. With two young children running around the house and seemingly taking up every spare moment of my time, it is hard sometimes to sit in the moment and enjoy it to its fullest. Every moment is not just my own anymore, but shared with those around me. The down time afforded to me is minimal at best and perhaps that is part of what brought that sense of perspective in regards to time to fruition. The sense that time is seemingly flying so rapidly right now that its almost a blur. Some days it almost seems like I was in the scene of a movie where I am standing still on a city street buzzing with activity and the scene was shot in such a way that everyone moving around me is blurred and nothing is in focus. Sometimes, that's what life feels like with two little kids. And yet, there are those moments that occur where everything slows down and if I'm attuned to it, can be in that moment and enjoy it, whether with my children or just by myself. I seek those moments, those little dips in activity where being present in the moment is all that matters. Those are the ones with the greatest sense of connection, the greatest sense of peace, that I seek not to push off, but to hold on to and perpetuate.
There is another piece to all of this, relative, yet separate that I don't know if everyone comes to term with these days. When the pieces of the "time" puzzle start to fit into place, realizing how long ago something happened or placing yourself on the scale of life, time, and significance, you start to understand your place in the overall scheme of things. When we look at the larger picture, it is a daunting one. When we simply realize the minute spec of time that we and 7 billion other people operate in, we start to realize that our lives don't really matter that much. Its not to say by an means that we aren't important to those around us or those we interact with every day, but on a larger scale, and for the majority of us, our lives will come and go and the vast majority of people on the planet will have no clue that we ever existed. There are many people who strive to inject significance into their lives, to do things that "matter" and "make a difference". If everyone tried to do this, almost everyone would "fail". There is nothing wrong with not making an impact on those beyond our sphere of influence or those that we interact with in our lives. What does matter is the impact we have on those people. Why should we bother if nothing we do will have lasting meaning? Because it can improve the quality of life for all those around us if we seek to live our lives the best we can. It may not have an effect on someone living in India, but it can affect our neighbor living just down the street. Even then, there are people who will get depressed thinking of the larger picture. We can affect the larger picture, for must of us however, it just be done on a smaller scale. While most of us may be able only able to affect 250-500 people, if we affect those people in positive way, then they will be more likely to affect those in their lives in a positive way and perpetuate it to a larger good. While our lives may be largely insignificant in the larger picture, maybe it isn't the larger picture we should be looking at. Maybe we should only focus on the smaller picture around us. Social media would have us believe that our significance is based on the amount of "likes" a post of ours gets or how many comments we can garner, or how many times something we post is "shared". In the end, though, none of that matters. Even one year down the road, our collective memory will forget those "likes" and "shares" and be on to the next "big thing". So, as such, we should focus on the small things that will actually make a difference in the lives of those around us. That is where we can have a lasting impact and where we can be "significant". In the end, even what I am writing now will most likely be forgotten. And yet, I still write. Why? There are many reasons, but two resonate the most; I write to have that "small" impact on those around me, but mostly to simply express myself and work through my thoughts in a more public fashion. That is all.
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