With all that is going on in the world, the killing and destruction, greed and thievery, I am going to keep it light today. Its Friday and I think we could all use a little dose of happiness today. Perhaps what I write today will give you an opportunity to tune out the world for a while, forget what is going on, and maybe think about your own family and the effect that they have on you. So I am going to talk about my son again today. I know I have said this before, but every day is an amazing day with my son. He is now a little over four months old and quickly developing into his own unique person. What I and almost every one who meets him can't help but notice is that he is an excessive smiler. Just the other day when we were in church, he was being fussy as it was nearing his bedtime and he probably just wanted to be at home, getting ready for bed. At the end of church, we walked around to say hello to a few friends and the fussiness disappeared, replaced by a smiling happy baby, eager to meet new people and share his wonderfully cute smile with them. It seems that as long as he isn't hungry, tired, or needs a diaper change, he is smiling and almost laughing. There have been a few times where he has outright laughed, but I don't think he realized how exactly he did it and he hasn't been able to replicate it on demand yet. But what he lacks in outright laughter, he makes up for in his smiles and demeanor. Just last week he figure out how to role over from his back onto his stomach and can't seem to get enough of the rolling. From stomach to back is still in the works, but he is getting closer every day. One other development, while I can't say I am overly happy about it, is that he now starts fussing when you take a toy away. Let the fun begin! But in all honesty, I couldn't be more happy about it because it just goes to show that he is slowly developing his powers of reason, cause and effect, and how to get his way. His development is astounding to me, but he has a much bigger effect on me than just that.
Getting him out of his crib every morning is one of my biggest joys. Whether it is slowly rousing him from the depths of the dream world or walking in to see his blue eyes gazing up at me, thumb stuck securely in his mouth, I relish the moment every day. His morning stretch is simply adorable, especially when he has been fast asleep. His arms shoot straight over his head, crooked at the elbow, he twists his head to the side and arches his back, and releases a little moan or grunt of disapproval at being awakened. How could I not smile, even when he doesn't want to be awake. After picking him up, he buries his head in my chest, rubbing his face back and forth till he can finally force his eyes open to take in the world that he has been thrust into from sleeping. I can't help but just hold him close, kiss him on top of his head, and bring him downstairs and into another day. No matter what kind of mood I might be in, the moment I see his face, my own face erupts in a smile. That alone, could perhaps be the best effect that he has on me. Don't get me wrong, it can be frustrating at times when he is really fussy and won't calm down, but even then, I can't help but think about his cuteness. The amount of time when he is actually fussy enough to be frustrating is nil. Even though he is starting to teethe, he still sleeps through the night and rarely complains about the white objects trying to push their way up through his gums. He is an amazing little boy and there is nothing in the world I would trade for fatherhood or the chance to watch him grow. His effect on my life is amazing. I could be having the worst day in the world and all I need to do is go look at his smiling face and all the worries and anxieties I might have been carrying with me that day melt away. To see him gaze intently back at me, with innocent, uncorrupted eyes is priceless.
I have heard from friends who are questioning becoming parents that they are not sure if they want to bring about that much change into their lives. They aren't sure if they have enough money to raise a child and still keep their lifestyle. They want to make sure that they are completely ready to have a child before even attempting to have one. I have news for everyone who questions it; no matter how ready you think you are, parenthood is a priceless experience and one that should be embraced. Becoming parents inevitably changes things, how could it not? Bringing a new life into the world will change who you are, who you thought you were, and make you a better person. I won't lie, I questioned what our lives would be like when we had a child, but none of those questions seem to matter when you find out you are actually going to have a child. A child is a blessing, nothing short of miracle, and there is not a single moment where I think I would like my old life back. I enjoyed my life before my son, don't get me wrong, but I enjoy my life now even more. Yes, finances are tighter, there is not as much time to go out and party, but none of that matters. We just trust that everything will work out for the best and 99.999% of the time it does. It seems that if you over think things too much, your own mind gets in the way of enjoying what is before you. Having a child is a matter of letting go and simply being. I love my son with everything I have and he brings joy to every day of my life. As a parent now, I couldn't imagine not being one. That, I guess, is the effect that my son has on me.
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